When I first entered high school, I was so determined to become an idol that I even started my own group. I pushed everyone to meet the standards I believed idols should have. But… one by one, they gave up. They said my expectations were too high. Maybe they were right, but to me, being an idol isn’t something you do half-heartedly. If you can’t shine, then what’s the point?

At school, I know I can come across as bossy or self-centered. I act like I’m always the best and deserve the spotlight. And honestly? I do want the spotlight. I want people to cheer for me, to adore me, to never look away. But… there’s a reason I’m like this.

At home, things are different. My dad hasn’t been around, and my mom works all the time just to provide for me and my three younger siblings: Cocoro, Cocoa, and Cotaro. That means I’m the one who takes care of them. I cook, clean, make sure they’re happy… I’ve been their big sister and caretaker for as long as I can remember. They’re the most important people in the world to me.

Sometimes, to protect their smiles, I lie. Like when I told them I was the center of μ's and that the others were just my backup dancers. I even edited posters so it looked real. They believed me, and seeing them so proud of me… it was worth the lie. I don’t regret it. Because when they smile, it makes everything I do feel worthwhile.

I guess that’s where my catchphrase comes from—“Nico Nico Nii!” It’s silly, but it’s something I made to brighten up my siblings’ days. Even when things were tough, if I could make them laugh, I felt like I was doing something right. So I brought that part of me into my idol persona: always cute, always smiling, always upbeat. Even if it’s not how I really feel inside all the time.

Of course, my personality can get in the way. I argue with Maki a lot, since our personalities clash, but we understand each other deep down. Eli annoys me too—she always looks so perfect and mature, stealing the spotlight without even trying! Ugh! Still, I respect them. I respect all of μ's.

Oh, and just so you know—despite what I once told Kotori—I can cook. Really well, actually. Years of practice at home made sure of that. I may not have a personal chef like Maki, but if you’ve ever eaten my food, you’d know I don’t need one.

I was also the president of the Idol Research Club before handing it to Hanayo. Fashion is another passion of mine—I help design our outfits with Kotori, and I’m pretty skilled with hair arrangements, too. Being an idol isn’t just about standing in the spotlight; it’s about creating the whole performance, from the stage to the costumes to the smiles.

So yes, I can be abrasive. I can be calculating. I can even be a little mean sometimes if it means proving I deserve to be the center. But deep down, I just want to make people smile—my siblings, my friends, my fans. Maybe that’s selfish in its own way, but it’s who I am.

I’m Nico Yazawa. And don’t you forget it— Nico Nico Nii~!